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 Back in the day…

Before cell phones
Before land lines were obsolete
Before my mom died,
She and I had a late-night code:
one of us would call the other and let it ring only once (so as not to wake everyone as all the phones in the house would ring) when we had something to talk about. 
The other would know to return the call. No matter what hour of the night. 
We would’ve already spoken that day, and we were living only a few houses apart from each other so there’s a good chance we had visited too, but those late night calls-when the world settled down to stillness and silence…we would share what only mothers and daughters share. 
It was such a simple gesture, those calls. 
I probably took it for granted-the fact that my mom was just one ring away. 
But those moments became some of my favorite memories. 

My mom is gone now but still, I leave my cell phone ringer on at night. 
I say it’s for emergencies 
but I think equally so it’s for the non-emergencies-when one of my daughters feels like talking and forgets the time difference so gives me a jingle. 
When another calls and says, oh were you sleeping, guess what? 
When the phone chirps in the middle of the night with a tic tok and a text from another that makes me smile not only cuz it’s silly but because we are connecting across time and miles even as the day ends and seeps into a new one. 
These, too, are some of my favorite moments. 

But I suppose I leave the ringer on for another reason. Maybe as a way to honor the connection between my mom and I; to say…
I haven’t forgotten. 
And to honor the sacred connection of communication between mothers and children…

Here’s to all the Moms who are with us and to those who are not. And to those precious beautiful connections that are simple and strong and will forever live on…


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